Monthly Archives: March 2013

Too Old to be a Groupie


Okay…. never in my life did I think I’d be as old as I am with a serious artist addiction.

*Hangs head in shame*

But, I *places hand over chest*, Jamillian Mogul Monroe, am a huge Rihanna fan. *Opens one eye to see if anything happens* rihanna

Honestly, I don’t know how this happened. Or when. All I know I know is that I literally feel my heart swelling with love everytime I hear her music. Who knew music could MOVE you like that?

I decided to play Rihanna radio on my Pandora and realized this addiction is bad. I never get tired of listening to her songs! “I just shot a man down, Pon De Replay, Talk that Talk, Photographs, Diamonds, Pour It Up, Whats My Name, Rude Boy”… I could go on forever, well not literally but… you know.

I know most young women my age as still part of the Beehive, the force known as Beyonce. Don’t get me wrong, Beyonce is a amazing performer…. but no matter what Beyonce sings or does, it always sounds like R&B.rihbey

Rihanna on the other hand can sing any genre from pop, reggae, rock, r&b, alternative ANYTHING. There have been times that I’ve heard her music in department stores and didn’t even realize it was her until later. What Rihanna lacks in performance ability she makes up for in VERSATILITY! 

Because my daughter is an avid groupie of the group One Direction, I recognize all the symptoms of groupie-ism. I wasn’t fully prepared to accept that as my official label until I realized that my newest hair ventures involve cutting my hair to look like her. Then, just the other day, I thought what if my 30th birthday party was a Rihanna party, with her songs playing all night?! -_- Yeah…. its bad.

Again, I *hang my head in shame*


Day 2, Pole Dance Class.


Last night, I abandoned my 2 children and my man to go to the dance studio for classes. Ordinarily, I would only be interested in pole class, but they were offering a free ballet class so, I thought “Is ballet only for skinny tall white girls with long necks? No, its 2013 all sizes welcome!” and whisked my large, short, brown, mommy of 2 self on in.

Fortunately there was only ONE other person in the class, so that made me really comfortable. Anyhow, took the class, enjoyed it and then proceeded to wait for the pole class to begin.

The class that I’m taking is at Vertical Joe’s Fitness Studio in Atlanta. I decided to take it because of the owner, Fiya Starta. I saw her on a video a couple years ago spinning on a pole upside down and thought, “Wow, she’s amazing… I could so totally do that”. Riiiiight, now 2 years later I’m in her class looking crazy.

I’ve been a little coy about the class and all because after taking my first class I realized this &$%@ is hard! Its no joke out here on the pole. I’m from Atlanta and been to a fair share of strip clubs and these women make it look amazing and easy! They prance around in their heels, climb the poles effortlessly and make it look sexy at the same damn time. After taking my first class, I wanted to slap all of the women I’ve seen at the strip club for making me think it would be as easy as heating up hot dogs.

But, sometime last year I really DECIDED that before I turned 30 years old, I would, ONCE AND FOR ALL, lose weight and climb a stripper pole to the top.

So, last night was day 2 on this OFFICIAL adventure….

Actually, last night was much better than the first few times I worked with a pole. Usually trying to mount the pole is like a mini fight. I usually come out feeling like Ive accomplished something, but I’ve banged up a shin or elbow in the process, so I come out needing ice and a hug. This time around however, other than the pain in my ‘pole meat’ as Ms. Joe calls it, which is the fat part in between your legs used to grip the pole, I felt pretty darn good! I was actually able to do my spins successfully, a pass out, basic spin and a basic slide. And, I think I ALMOST climbed an INCH!

Whooooo-hooooooooooo! Can you tell them dancers at Magic City and Onyx to watch out?!


So back to class again on Wednesday. I may need like 232489734792834 more classes, but I have taken 2 OFFICIAL classes think I will be able to conquer this thing by August!

Journey to 30!!!!!!


Its finally here. The year of 30. 

What’s the big deal about 30 anyways? Is it just as significant as EVERY number when you count by 10’s? 

So, last year I decided I would throw a 30th birthday party. That party was to take place the weekend of August 24th 2013. However, it looks like that won’t happen since my planning is taking place ‘last minute’. 

Instead, I’ve decided to give my focus to other very important things. And for your reading pleasure, I’ve decided to list them here.

1. Climb to the top of a stripper pole.

2. Beat someone’s ass through extensive karate/kickboxing training.

3. Buy a gun and learn how to shoot said gun.

4. Spend thousands of dollars taking my 4 kids to the Bahamas.

5. Lose about 30 more lbs so that I can look better than all the bitches at my class reunion.

I have other things on this list, but I will post as time goes along.